This sucks.

I am not happy with my NPCC posting, that's right, I'm NOT! (And some of my squadmates feel the same with theirs as well) Member of games & PT and Logistics & Admin, that is not what I wanted. I wonder why am I in such a mess. In the Hierarchy chart, I am 2nd next to the "group" of 'unreliables' (If you get my drift). I wanted to be an SI, not granted. To be Log head, not granted. To be Games head, not even close.

I wonder why I was given such a low position, was it because I unknowingly insulted someone of a higher rank, of dumb luck, or something else. I cannot believe it. All my enthusiasm, my attitude gone to waste. I just cannot believe it, I did my best, but it was not enough. I think something stinks in my reputation or I might have deteriorated in my NPCC performance from sec 1 all the way till now. I just cannot believe it, why? WHY? I want to appeal, but...to quote from Eric sir (more or less) "there is a 99% chance of your appeal not being successful."

I am at a loss about what to do, sometimes, I have a feeling of grief and of low self esteem, I even cried my own pathetic self to sleep yesterday for heaven's sake (well...sort of..). Can this get any worse?!